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  1. #1

    Referees in Scotland


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    Default Increasing lack of respect?

    I'm wondering if other referees are noticing or experiencing a lack of respect from teams and coaches.

    I have refereed 3 games this season where either the whole (losing) team and coaches, or the vast majority of them, have refused to shake my hand after a game. I appreciate they may have disagreed with the way I referred the game, not liked my decisions, thought I was rubbish etc. But I always thought you left that rubbish in the 80 minutes (or the bar afterwards!) and made sure you were sporting and showed respect afterwards by shaking the hands of the officials and the opposition. It's doubly frustrating in many cases it's not just players, but coaches and club officials. If they don't set the right tone it's probably not surprising the players behave in this way.

    Has anyone else experienced this?

    ive been lucky that on 2 of the occasions I had a referee coach with me who said I'd had a good game. Without that support I'd be seriously questioning whether it's worth it.

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    Default Re: Increasing lack of respect?

    It's a perennial challenge over here.

    There isn't a season goes by where I don't threaten to send a coach from the field. It gets better in some places, and worse in others. One common thread seems to be teams who are on the slide from where they used to be. Yes, UVa, UMd and VaTech, that means you.
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    Tullamore Dew, the Afghan Wigs, and many, many strippers - how to get over your ex. How true.

  3. #3

    Referees in Scotland
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    Default Re: Increasing lack of respect?

    Paule23, make sure you feed back that sort of behaviour to your referee society. They will want to monitor that and may take some action if it is prevalent from particular clubs.

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    Referees in England
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    Default Re: Increasing lack of respect?

    Quote Originally Posted by Paule23 View Post
    I'm wondering if other referees are noticing or experiencing a lack of respect from teams and coaches.

    I have refereed 3 games this season where either the whole (losing) team and coaches, or the vast majority of them, have refused to shake my hand after a game. I appreciate they may have disagreed with the way I referred the game, not liked my decisions, thought I was rubbish etc. But I always thought you left that rubbish in the 80 minutes (or the bar afterwards!) and made sure you were sporting and showed respect afterwards by shaking the hands of the officials and the opposition. It's doubly frustrating in many cases it's not just players, but coaches and club officials. If they don't set the right tone it's probably not surprising the players behave in this way.

    Has anyone else experienced this?

    ive been lucky that on 2 of the occasions I had a referee coach with me who said I'd had a good game. Without that support I'd be seriously questioning whether it's worth it.
    It does happen from time to time - particularly if there was one single decision they feel you have got wrong, and they then blame you for losing the match. Good communication really helps reduce this, as does being close to the flashpoint incident. However, if their authority figures (captain, coach) start questioning you then the players tend to follow. If it's verbal abuse, speak with captain (your privilege to consult me does not extend to questioning my decisions...) and penalise/cards. Any verbal abuse from officials (or anyone else after the game) - report it. The quicker it's seen by our powers that be, the sooner any trend/repeat behaviour is spotted and dealt with at a higher level. If you do nothing, then next week's ref could get the same treatment, and may not be as thick-skinned/experienced as you, and may end up giving up reffing. I do blame the bleeding over of this behaviour from the round ball game, and do call it out as appropriate (that in itself can stop players misbehaving).

    As to handshakes, I generally don't proffer my hand unless a player offers. Make sure you go through the players tunnel whatever. If you have a chance afterwards (typically when signing cards), have a conversation (what could I have done that would have helped?) to try and understand what teed them off - it may not be what you were thinking. I've uncovered simple lack of law knowledge or worse - "the ref training course I went on last week definitely said that couldn't happen..."

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    Default Re: Increasing lack of respect?

    It is increasing and we are part of the solution. We MUST report stuff even if it does not bother us. Other refs may not be so strong.

  6. #6

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    Default Re: Increasing lack of respect?

    Quote Originally Posted by Pegleg View Post
    It is increasing and we are part of the solution. We MUST report stuff even if it does not bother us. Other refs may not be so strong.
    But what are you reporting exactly? Refusing to shake hands may be a bit "off" but it's hardly "abuse".

    My point is, what exactly are the authorities expected to do about it?

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    Default Re: Increasing lack of respect?

    I remind clubs who are a bit "off" without being actually abusive that refereeing is a volunteer activity and I can't - and won't - force referees to go to a club they don't want to.

    i'm not withdrawing service, just laying a possible set of consequences for behavior.
    The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane.
    Marcus Aurelius

    Man may do as he will; he may not will what he wills
    Arthur Schopenhauer

    Tullamore Dew, the Afghan Wigs, and many, many strippers - how to get over your ex. How true.

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    Default Re: Increasing lack of respect?

    Quote Originally Posted by Taff View Post
    But what are you reporting exactly? Refusing to shake hands may be a bit "off" but it's hardly "abuse".

    My point is, what exactly are the authorities expected to do about it?
    It;s part of the ethos of our game. So you make the appointment officer and other referees aware. You report the "welcome" to your society and should referees chose collectively or individually to boycott that team / club, so be it. Of course, you could just sit back and wait until it gets out of hand and then we can have lots of hand ringing when some poor begger gets the result.
    Last edited by Pegleg; 04-12-16 at 20:12.

  9. #9

    Referees in Scotland


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    Default Re: Increasing lack of respect?

    Do any Societies have meetings or a forum for coaches in their area, where referees and coaches (or team officials) meet? This might be an idea as an education piece. An opportunity on a regular basis to re-emphasis referees are volunteers, are human and deserve at least respect for what they do. Recurring themes could be discussed from both sides. I am too junior to know if this happens and is just not shared, or if it has not been thought of.

    I know logistics, organisation and apathy could be an issue, but is it a good idea?

  10. #10

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    Default Re: Increasing lack of respect?

    I've genuinely only had one game this season where 2 players from a team refused to shake my hand. They got beat by 40 points so clearly it wasn't a decision that cost them.
    I usually get two chances to shake hands as the tunnel is formed where visitors walk through first then as a ref I walk through both teams etc.
    I smiled when this happened then offered my hand and said well played 13 as he turned away.
    Paule you will always get the odd knobhead in every team.
    Always report abuse or perceived abuse to your society. We are encouraged to drop an email to our society. It may not be abuse to you but making the ref feel uncomfortable may be happening every week.
    Don't ignore it.
    Ciaran Trainor

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