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Danie Rossouw's World Cup Diary - September 4st 2011

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Disclaimer - This comes from a friend, so not my writing, but too good not to pass on.

4 September 2011:

I are arrived!

After catching the wrong plane, then knocking a few others on, I finally gotted a plane to New Zealand.

It's strange to think that I was here only a month ago with at least two other guys in this squad, in an attempt to show the world the Springboks strength in depth. Unfortunately we was robbed in that game by the referee and the All Blacks, who kept scoring tries and refusing to let us score tries. It's just not cricket.

The New Zealand peoples has gone world cup crazy! Everywhere I go all the talk is about the world cup. So far I has been to our hotel and the rugby ground and the rugby training place and the gym and press conferences. Jusus people! Don't you have anything else to talk about?

Press conferences take much longer in New Zealand because all the New Zealand reporters do a Haka before they ask a question. John says that we has to respect their culture and wait patiently until they are finished, before telling them how kak the All Blacks are without Carter.

But it is not just the reporters. We are respecting culture everywhere. Passport control - Haka - then checks passport. Luggage handler - Haka - then carries bag. Bus driver - Haka - then drives bus. Hotel check in clerk - Haka - then checks us in. Waitress at restaurant - Haka - then takes our order. I don't means to complains but if I see one more Haka I fink I'm going to ****ing lose it. Tomorrow we is going to the Maori cultural museum.

Found out that there's a problem wiff our kit for the tournament. Our kit manager, Francois Louw, says that we has enough Springbok tops for the entire tournament, but we only have enough armbands for four matches! John says that we will have to act like men and not complain too much, however we will of course be wearing them against Wales after what what their coach said about our team. What a poes!

I did make a joke about the Wales coach's name. I asked John what his name are and John said it is "Katlund" and I said, "Ja nee, more like Gatland". Jusus I laughed! I don't fink John understooded my funny joke.

Another problem wiff the armbands! As the armbands are black, we are not allowed to wear them because to wear black on the rugby field is to disrespect rugby culture. Bakkies did suggested that we wear armbands about not being able to wear armbands, but then we will be wearing more black and that's just going to make more trouble and we've upset the England camp enough by suggesting that they play a limited form of rugby by playing wiff a kicking flyhalf and expecting their big forwards to bash it up. Stupid England rugby tactics make I laugh.